Dave Chapelle: Why Terrorists Won't take black People As Hostages

Comments: 8 824

  • roman hall
    roman hall 59 minutes ago

    "..He was Chinese.." haha

  • ImNotCool
    ImNotCool 13 hours ago

    I wanna be black now

  • april fraser
    april fraser 19 hours ago

    "Now get out there and be somebody!" πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

  • Kelly Kelly
    Kelly Kelly Day ago

    Ohhhhhh Marilyn Monroe!!!!πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ love her tho!!!!

  • 24 kobe is the best 24

    (Racist)White people F.Y.I it's nearing 2018 typing nigger when your expressing your feelings towards African Americans won't bring slavery back or offend any of us. Lol. You'll get your asses handed to you if you even so much as think it around us now. Go protest and waste your fucking time the minority's you hate just because the color of there skin aren't going any fucking where !!!

  • KO Bossy
    KO Bossy Day ago

    I KNEW he was gonna say Kennedy. That guy was getting busy left and right- that's why his back was always hurting. Great president though

  • Joe Ledger
    Joe Ledger Day ago

    His white voice is on point

  • jaylln jackson
    jaylln jackson 2 days ago

    Shout out to ray ray amd big Steve send some newportsπŸ˜‚

  • Dev Beeb
    Dev Beeb 2 days ago

    He raped someone in the White House, good character?

  • Carlos E R Pimentel
    Carlos E R Pimentel 2 days ago

    Well, Kennedy didn't rape Monroe.

  • Carlos E R Pimentel
    Carlos E R Pimentel 2 days ago +1

    HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA "come here little nigger baby kiss" HAHAHHAHAHAHHA

  • Psycho chizzi
    Psycho chizzi 2 days ago

    "..So anyway i was fuckin ma wife" πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

  • - inTegrity -
    - inTegrity - 3 days ago

    What U sayin'? I'm not Black?
    😎

  • Colt 45 zag
    Colt 45 zag 3 days ago

    EPIC! ONE NATION! πŸ˜πŸ˜ƒ

  • Antonio Montgomery
    Antonio Montgomery 3 days ago

    How ironic this pops up as a recommendation after Charlottesville

  • Tango Bob
    Tango Bob 3 days ago

    Legend...

  • ESKET IT
    ESKET IT 3 days ago

    "Sign the treaty baby, I'll suck yo dick"

    HELLA PPL STAND UP πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ’€πŸ’€

  • JAMES ALLEN MARSHAL
    JAMES ALLEN MARSHAL 3 days ago

    true
    ha haha

  • Jean-Luc Walker
    Jean-Luc Walker 4 days ago

    apparently, boko haram aren't terrorists.

  • Lankesh Khole
    Lankesh Khole 5 days ago

    Need subtitles. Can't understand everything..

  • indonev123
    indonev123 5 days ago

    Man I could watch his old stand-ups monthly and still laugh constantly. Hilarious.

  • mike miller
    mike miller 5 days ago

    Just trash talking and people think it's funny. Sad 😭

  • subseven
    subseven 5 days ago +1

    we wuz hostijiz

  • Jeremy Lohmann
    Jeremy Lohmann 5 days ago

    So I was fucking my wife in the assπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

  • IFreakingEatPeople
    IFreakingEatPeople 6 days ago

    Uhh yeah they is treatin us good... we all chillin and shit.. I'd like to give a shout out to ray ray and big Steve from Newport

  • ja JΓ―p
    ja JΓ―p 7 days ago

    Fuck you chapelle Illuminati shill, Kennedy was the best president we ever had, he stood up to your Illuminati Master's and paid the price, every president since then are nwo serfs like yourself

  • Nedal Wazwaz
    Nedal Wazwaz 7 days ago

    This video has 4 thousand dislikes.. Smh

  • Jagraj Wasan
    Jagraj Wasan 7 days ago

    Interesting how terrorists always have middle eastern accents

  • Learn&teach2Learn
    Learn&teach2Learn 7 days ago

    Dave Chapelle > Black comedians today

  • fluxmuldar
    fluxmuldar 7 days ago

    Good bit, but it always bugged me that this obviously never happened to him. There's embellishing a story and then there's making shit up.

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  • Wellness and Self Worth

    I miss old Dave Chappell.

  • Armenak Balasanov
    Armenak Balasanov 8 days ago

    So basically he started his show by making racial jokes about black people and pointing on how white world treats black people.... then he turned on white world(elite) by showing as an example 2 america's presidents and made them to look even worse than black people

  • Divyanshu Pathak
    Divyanshu Pathak 9 days ago

    2:30 ROFL genius.....😁😁😁😁

  • Samuel Mui
    Samuel Mui 9 days ago

    Kinda coincidental with his black people hostage joke in that Dave Chapelle's character "Pinball" in the movie "Conair" was perceived as bad leverage as a hostage because he was a "two-bit negro crackhead."

  • Court Love
    Court Love 9 days ago

    The funniest comedian of all time! You hear me of all time!!!

  • That_Ford _Guy
    That_Ford _Guy 9 days ago

    Man I love Dave Chappelle he's funny AFπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

  • maria renaud
    maria renaud 9 days ago

    Truth

  • David Lang
    David Lang 9 days ago +1

    5:23 talk about jumping out of your seat

  • Melo Melo
    Melo Melo 9 days ago

    The real Dave, not that other guy

  • Melanated Man
    Melanated Man 10 days ago

    Yes, White House we have got five black hello ,hello.

    • sfoth91
      sfoth91 10 days ago

      "Good joke! Talk to you later" ... Beep Beep


  • till klein
    till klein 10 days ago

    Force unless database political warning majority finger charge no.

  • Marteen Mwangi
    Marteen Mwangi 10 days ago +1

    He's worse than Jim Crow

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    James Edmond 10 days ago

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  • Mike Mancuso
    Mike Mancuso 10 days ago

    Can't believe I never caught one of his skits ever before tonight. This guy is fricken hilarious! Thanks Dave I needed a good laugh tonight.

  • EM. REY.
    EM. REY. 10 days ago +1

    _Hello we got 5 black..Hello?_

  • Thomas Sebastian
    Thomas Sebastian 10 days ago

    Malayalamsong

  • Phoenix North
    Phoenix North 10 days ago

    so I was fucking her in the ass
    yeah but who are you voting for

  • Brandon Ridberg
    Brandon Ridberg 10 days ago

    5:23 Dude in the back trying to start a standing ovation.

  • Cara D
    Cara D 11 days ago

    same reason fat women are never kidnapped

  • Naja Simbala
    Naja Simbala 11 days ago +1

    Lol the George Bush kiss

  • hey
    hey 11 days ago

    Daves white guy voice kind of sounds like ObamaπŸ˜‚

  • Melancholia09
    Melancholia09 11 days ago

    Hmmm Letsee.....the last video I saw where a black person asked a white person who they voted for ended with the 5 blacks stomping the shit out of the white person. So.....Dave wonders why we keep our "Political Affiliations" to ourselves?

  • GENERATION IRON
    GENERATION IRON 12 days ago +2

    White people voice on point

  • Guled Yusuf
    Guled Yusuf 12 days ago

    What's the title of this stand-up???

  • Vendrick
    Vendrick 12 days ago

    "Come here little nigger baby MUAH πŸ’‹" haha πŸ˜‚ that's my favorite part!

  • John Prudent
    John Prudent 12 days ago

    Great vid. Just sucks that it ends in the middle of the Clinton joke

  • Liam Hennig
    Liam Hennig 12 days ago

    I love it how black people like Hillary Clinton when she supports the kkk

  • Russel Balugo
    Russel Balugo 12 days ago

    but Clinton slept with some bitch. That's worse than sniffin coke.

  • Daniele Pezon
    Daniele Pezon 12 days ago

    Terrorists Boko Haram captured hundred of black girls???

  • Monique Cruickson
    Monique Cruickson 12 days ago

    One of the greatest to do this form of art. Having the capability to make millions of people laugh is truly a gift. He's always going to be in my top 5.

  • Oh Yeah
    Oh Yeah 13 days ago

    Even terrorist know who the true terrorist are in America(whites), which is why they don't target blacks. You want to see America for what it is, look at it from the outside.

  • Oh Yeah
    Oh Yeah 13 days ago

    My friend fought in Desert Storm Gulf War. A captured Iraq soldier said to him, "we're not fighting you but those that oppress you".

  • dice boys
    dice boys 13 days ago

    Can't wait to see a new video in the future on him including trump on the president skits

  • Tony Mcloughlin
    Tony Mcloughlin 13 days ago

    Funny guy

  • theminute man
    theminute man 13 days ago

    Isn't it funny how Bill Clinton was actually snorting crack?

  • Hunter Sanchez
    Hunter Sanchez 13 days ago

    "ComeherelittleniggerbabyMwah"

  • first 48
    first 48 13 days ago

    try to talk bout this or joke about this in 2017. ww3 is gonna start

  • RandomBloke
    RandomBloke 13 days ago

    They won't take black girls because the police would hear them

  • Alma Verde
    Alma Verde 13 days ago

    Dave chappelle = legend

  • d.a BJJ
    d.a BJJ 13 days ago

    2 the 4k ppl that don't like this vid fuck u chappelle is king

  • Hamilton Mcgregory
    Hamilton Mcgregory 13 days ago

    Bitch my families here uhhh uh

  • Movie Games
    Movie Games 13 days ago

    black people don't show up because they are irrelevant

  • Kristoffer Bon
    Kristoffer Bon 13 days ago

    4:41

  • Allpha KUN
    Allpha KUN 13 days ago

    What about boku haram

  • Eric Day
    Eric Day 13 days ago

    This guy is very talented, something that Kevin Hart is not.

  • WILLIAM WITZKE
    WILLIAM WITZKE 13 days ago

    THEY SHOULD TAKE EM AS HOSTAGES...GOTTA HAVE SOMETHIN TO USE FOR TARGET PRACTICE !!!!!!

  • Killereye10
    Killereye10 13 days ago

    Black Larry the cable guy

  • the douche
    the douche 13 days ago

    And if a white comedian impersonates a black person the world goes buzurk

  • The Interjew
    The Interjew 14 days ago

    I thought "we are all equal"? At least so they say.

  • Marybeth Kszystyniak-hamblen

    How can one guy be so awesome...β™‘β™‘β™‘β™‘β™‘β™‘

  • Sam Cohen
    Sam Cohen 15 days ago

    Wanna give a shout out to ray ray.. lol

  • 99legion
    99legion 15 days ago

    Actually there's some truth to this, osama bin laden himself said that muslims shouldn't attack minority populations in the west because they need them to ferment hatred of western societies, and they will need their help to bring them down.

  • Computer Simulated Atomic Coded Reality

    i thought he was gonna say "because the police would give them a school bus and let them drive into the sunset with the hostages"

  • Paul Hadden
    Paul Hadden 16 days ago

    Hell not even a shitty assed rag heads don't even want their sorry asses.

  • Christian Wison
    Christian Wison 16 days ago

    Hope the blacks rule word, fuck Chinese islanders, whites. Blacks rule

  • Wayne Rees
    Wayne Rees 16 days ago

    I'm sure I've heard this joke from a different comedian

  • cristiancristir1
    cristiancristir1 16 days ago

    :))

  • Dee Marty
    Dee Marty 16 days ago

    Audio too low like hes whispering

  • Daddy Chase
    Daddy Chase 16 days ago

    As funny as crabs.

  • unleashtheflavor
    unleashtheflavor 16 days ago

    Y'no whaut em sayn ?

    No. Go fuck yourself.

  • Joe Redmond
    Joe Redmond 16 days ago

    He is so different today

  • Caleb Davis
    Caleb Davis 16 days ago

    *calls white house
    "Hello, we have five black peo-
    Hello? πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

  • waskly wabbit
    waskly wabbit 17 days ago

    8:19 so true right there

  • filthy frank boss
    filthy frank boss 17 days ago

    nigga its funny

  • filthy frank boss
    filthy frank boss 17 days ago

    funny as fucking hell nigga

  • TheClassictvfan
    TheClassictvfan 17 days ago

    Send some Newports....dying!!

  • Paul Thomson
    Paul Thomson 17 days ago

    Why does this racist prick keep showing up in my recommended?

  • Doorhenge
    Doorhenge 17 days ago

    Heylo WE HAV GUT FIV BLICK PEEHOL! AND WERE PREPEARED TO- Heylo?

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